Christmas in a Little City

    There is something sweet about a little city during the holidays.  Decorations are all over the main portion of down town, the park is a winter wonderland filled with Christmas trees all a glow with multi-colored strings of lights and Santa Claus makes his annual appearance to greet the kids.   There is a special feeling in the air around this time.  People seem to smile more, be friendlier and generally kinder.  Perhaps it’s all of the holiday good will and tidings of joy spread through music and movies.  Or maybe it’s fueled by the scents coming out of the local bakeries as they create decadent sweets for holiday consumption. Whatever it cause, it is nice to have more good and happy things surrounding us as the holiday approaches.

      Life here is a short one.  There is enough evil in the world to keep the media humming along for an eternity.  Right now, I’m thankful for the brief reprise of this in my little city where the local folk are all pleasantly getting along as we prepare for St. Nick’s arrival.

      It’s hard to imagine that another year is about to pass. Time is truly fleeting.  As we get ready to leave 2014 behind, look towards the future with all the possibilities it brings. My personal goal for 2015 is to write a great deal more as my blog submissions have waned a bit the past 2 months. 

No matter what you celebrate, I wish you all a very happy holiday season, a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Peace, Love & Joy to you all.

Media Feeding Frenzy

            I’ve been watching a great deal of television over the past week while fighting off a bad bout of bronchitis. (There’s a tongue twister for you.) My favorite shows have been on PBS and are mostly documentaries.  The latest series from Ken Burns on the Roosevelts has been captivating.  The subject has been so interesting that I watched Hyde Park on the Hudson on demand as well.

            While it can be said that we don’t have true royals in America, we do have families akin to the aristocracy.  Families such as the Roosevelts, Vanderbelts, Astors, Kennedys and even the Hiltons have captured the imagination of our culture.  What I have found most interesting is the way the media has or has not documented behaviors or images of these families.

            Specifically, I find it telling that the journalists of the depression era chose not to show the American public that FDR suffered a loss of his mobility after fighting polio.  His legs were in braces; he was not able to walk and often had to be carried by a trusted bodyguard to move from one area to another.  Can you imagine if this were the case today?

            The media frenzy around photographing this type of event would be deplorable.  There would probably be incentives thrown at employees by media giants to capture the image.  Never mind that this was the President of the United States.  In today’s climate, everyone is fare game.

            It makes me wonder what happened to our society to have this become the norm?  When the price of fame – be it political fame or entertainment based or just due to extreme wealth – is a lack of privacy.  I wonder.  Yes, some people in those categories behave horribly and in those instances, I understand having the media focus on them.  If someone is embezzling, violent or unfaithful it’s horrible.  Still, the question remains – should this be exposed to the public?

            Discuss.

Ambien Man

            I read an article sent out by the Today Show on Face Book regarding the sleep aid Ambien.  It highlighted the odd behavior patterns people display while asleep who take the drug.  The woman who was the focus of the piece would sleep walk, eat, and shop online all while under the influence of Ambien.  These behaviors presented while she was in a different state of consciousness.  Disturbing enough but it gets worse, for she didn’t recall any of these actions in the morning. 

            Several years ago, I have had personal experience with Ambien.  A man I was seeing at the time was taking the drug.  It slowly became clear to me that I was involved with two different men: one pre-Ambien and one post-Ambien. 

            In the early stages of the relationship, what we call a “honeymoon phase,” things were close to perfect.  Naturally this changes over time.  However, I began to grow confused by his conduct as he frequently displayed contrasting behavior.  A clear picture began to emerge one evening when I spent the night.  He decided we should watch a movie in bed.  I watched as he made popcorn in the kitchen, went over to a cabinet, popped a pill in his mouth, swallowed the remains of a glass of wine and made his way to the bedroom.  We were in the bed with the popcorn conversing when he nodded off for a moment and then popped open wide-awake.  It was like a computer rebooting itself.  After this, he started to talk differently.  His tone and attitude completely changed.  Suddenly, he was open, confessing that he was “crazy about me” and that I should consider “moving in with him.”  It was so unlike him – he was generally guarded emotionally and didn’t share what he was thinking.  I questioned him cautiously at that point.  I asked the one question I thought would answer all of this; “Did you take an Ambien?”  His response was yes that he had taken one before the movie started, noting that I was in the room when he had done so.  I asked him why and he stated that it takes a while to work.  Clearly, he was wrong. 

            The drug Ambien took away his guarded behavior.  He spoke openly and freely about his feelings toward me as well as life in general.  Additionally, he became an insatiable lover who focused on my needs.  He made sure these were met before he completely passed out.  I must admit, this side effect was a well-received pleasure for me. 

            The problem was when morning came he didn’t remember any of this.  He would accuse me of making up stories when I told him things he had said and done the night before.  Sadly he returned to his normal state of guarded, defensive behavior with the sunrise.  I began to recognize that I preferred the Ambien man to the Awake guy.  Ambien man was a dream: sweet, giving and emotionally available.  Awake guy turned out to be a self-absorbed, arrogant ass.  It was a twisted play on Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde minus murder.  Eventually, I ended the relationship. 

Although doctors state Ambien is for short-term use it appears to be an easy drug to become addicted to.  As in the story from Today, people can switch doctors to extend the use of sleep aids.  I have not been Mr. Ambien Man’s life for quite some time and I have no idea if he continued to use the drug.  Clearly this powerful sleep aid has many odd effects on the human body and should be studied further.

Proud Feminist

       This entry is overdue, as I must give credit to Emma Watson on her moving and poignant speech at the UN on gender equality in September.  Her involvement in the HeForShe Campaign highlights my discussion on this matter in a previous entry in Tales of a Little City titled A Woman’s Place posted on September 2, 2014.  I am proud to see a strong young woman give a voice to the Feminist movement.

        I think the fact that a young intelligent woman as Watson is aware and open to speaking up says a great deal about her character.  It was wonderful to read the outpouring of support from others, both male and female, to her speech.  Instead of repeating all she stated, I am happy to provide the link to her speech from the official United Nations youtube site. Watch her, applaud her efforts and pray that things actually change.

Angels Among Us

     Last week I was reading Patty Kogutek’s newsletter and pondered the question she had posed.  While writing about her recent move, she discussed the blessings bestowed upon her family and the presence of Angels that became evident in unusual places.  She asked if others had similar experiences. As one of her readers, I decided to write in and share a story of my personal experience with Angels.  How could I not share the same with my own readers?  Below is what I sent.

November 28, 2011 was a sorrowful night.  That evening my sweet dog Lucy passed away in my arms.  She had been diagnosed with lung cancer just 12 days prior and her heart, which was damaged from years of breeding, wasn’t able to continue on.  Six and half years earlier, I had rescued my girl from the streets of Los Angeles.  She was dumped, no longer wanted in the puppy mill she had been enslaved by.  She wasn’t the only one.  Several teacup sized Maltese in horrendous health conditions were found the day I rescued her.

The best thing I ever did was rescue and rehabilitate my Lucy.  It took years for her to feel 100% secure.  Life in a cage will have that effect on any living creature.  Eventually she grew to trust that she was safe with me.  I gave her a home, good food and much love.  When we moved into our new house in 2010 she enjoyed the yard as well as the comforts within.  On the day we returned from the vets after her dreadful diagnosis, Lucy danced in her yard on her hind legs.  She was so happy to return!  I knew there was no place else my baby wanted to be and I was determined to give her the most wonderful time she could have while alive. 

Our house felt different almost immediately upon returning that Friday.  I sensed the Angels around us. I began to talk to them and let them know I felt their presence.  I actually told them out loud that I knew why they were there and that I didn’t want them to take my Lucy away. Over the next two days I could sense their numbers increasing. It was the oddest feeling-like a circle of beings were standing around me. I could feel them, but I couldn’t see them.  In the end I sensed 7 Angelic spirits who had gathered in my home to assist with my Lucy’s passing and bring me comfort.    

That last night I held Lucy in my arms wrapped in her favorite blanket and placed her over my heart – her favorite place to perch.  We walked around the house so she could say goodbye to each room.  All the while I felt surrounded by Angels.  I knew that she was going to God and they were there to collect her.  Two hours later she was gone.  I clung to her little body and cried deeply, weeping in a way I never had before.  I could tell I wasn’t alone, but my focus changed.  My heartbreak and sorrow took over.

Three years later, I was again hosting the New England Book Festival in Boston.  On this evening a pair of co-authors had been honored for their book The Growth of Truth and were on hand to receive their award.  The book is about the life of a psychic medium and the way her gifts affect her life.  As I approached them, Debbie (whom the book is about) began to display her amazing gift by channeling.  Immediately she informed me that 7 spirits surrounded me and that this was a large number.  I took the opportunity to ask about my Lucy.  She smiled and told me in detail how my dog had passed. She provided details that weren’t available to anyone! Debbie also informed me that Lucy wanted to thank me for the love and comfort I gave her and that her crossing over was like falling asleep.  

How could I not immediately recognize the number 7? It was the number I sensed that evening – the number of Angels around me.  The comfort I felt was immediate.  While sorrow still resonates around losing my beloved dog, Debbie was able to give me peace with her abilities.  It makes me wonder if she too is an Angel granting gifts of healing to those of us with pain in our hearts.

     I you haven’t read the wonderful authors I discuss here, their works are available on Amazon as well as other booksellers.  Patty Kogutek is the author of A Change of Habit. Deborah Raymond-Pinet and Bonnie Meroth are the authors of The Growth of Truth, A True Story of the Heaven and Hell of a Psychic Medium.

Morning Commute

            Please forgive me, dear readers, for my absence in postings.  I have recently joined the ranks of the commuters having secured a new position in Cambridge, MA.  It’s a challenge rising at 5:00 am in order to catch the train.  However, I love the city and being surrounded by the buildings as I ride in on the commuter rail.  The day starts early as I watch the sun rise from the train.  The very first ride to work, I watched the sky change color slowly as a mist hovered over a field and nestled gently between the trees.  The foliage was spotlighted as the sun rose.  It was lovely.  I wish I had a proper camera to capture this image as I flew by on the train. 

        Getting adjusted to this time change has been the biggest challenge for me.  I have never been a morning person.  Now I watch the sky gently let go of the night like it is releasing a warm hug.  It’s twilight, a time I used to sleep through but now I get to enjoy its beauty daily.  As I write the sky is turning pink as the sun begins to rise.

        I truly enjoy the ride in and always smile at the gorgeous Boston skyline glowing in the sunlight.  As I cross into Cambridge, I take in the scene off the red line. There are still sailboats out on the Charles, the Pru stands tall and glistening and the architecture of the bridge close to the TD Center is a stunning addition to the city’s beauty.  Boston is the city I grew up in and went to college in.  It will always have a place etched in my heart.  As lovely as Rhode Island is and as am happy as I am to live there, Boston will always own a small piece of me.

Open Letter to Yahoo

            Dear Yahoo Executives,

            Your email system and search engine have been failing as of late.  Articles about email hackers targeting Yahoo accounts have been popping up throughout the year (Forbes, Chicago Tribune, Washington Post, PC World, etc.).  This confirms my suspicions along with the endless amount of spam emails that suggest I spend my money on a wide variety of pharmaceuticals.   Perhaps this stems from a flaw within your system for hackers to utilize or perhaps it stems from the pool of advertisers you accept as paying customers.  Consider this – I often find deceptive advertisements from questionable sources in flashing boxes on your news pages. People are attacked by these ads as they are often animated, feature a celebrity name or image and are disruptive to the news story page they are posted on. They often feature famous faces and claim to support a product or disclose a “secret”. The two most common names/faces found are that of Dr. Oz and Ellen DeGeneres.

How often have we seen Dr. Oz stating on his program that any advertisement featuring his name endorsing a product are not true and to report it to his people via his webpage?  Yet, everyday that I log on to Yahoo I see this type of advertisement.  Why is that?

Either your sales department is working overtime to meet quotas and take advertising funds from questionable sources or, is it possible, that the Yahoo system has been hacked and these ads have been placed?  It’s time for you all to reevaluate.

Flu Bug

     I’ve spent the majority of a week sick with flu-like symptoms after getting the flu shot.  It’s been a less than enjoyable experience as I lay in my bed with chills, fever, cough and congestion.  This particular bug causes a great deal of phlegm to build up.  The coughing has been monumental and continuous.  It’s been an incredibly uncomfortable week. 

     It has made me wonder how many people this happens to. I posed this question to a variety of local people and found the results interesting. I’ve heard from people that have a genuine fear of the flu shot.  One woman stated that she refused to receive one after her mother had one many years ago, developed phenomena and died within weeks. Others stated they felt the government was using us as test subjects against our knowledge.  There are those who believed the shot included a live version of the virus, some believed it was dead and others weren’t sure. 

     I’ve done a bit of research on flu symptoms and vaccines online and found official information on the CDC as well as medical websites and magazines.  I found that the information listed by Harvard Medical School to be the easiest one to follow.  The link is http://www.health.harvard.edu/flu-resource-center/10-flu-myths.htm for those of you that would like to read more. 

  

     I’m beginning to bounce back to complete health. While the cough is still lingering the other symptoms have gone.  I fell behind in so many things and truly miss going to my favorite workout class early in the mornings.  It’s going to take time for me to catch up, but I’m sure I’ll be back on track by the end of this new week.  I plan on increasing my writing time as well so be sure to keep an eye open for additional posts to Tales of a Little City.

Distant Lands

             I traveled with a friend to a resort in the Republic of Cape Verde earlier this month.  For those of you who aren’t familiar, the Republic of Cape Verde is a cluster of ten volcanic islands off the northern coast of Africa.  Nine of these islands are inhabited and have become a holiday hot spot for Europeans.  The tropical climate, beauty and close proximity attracts large numbers of tourists from the UK, Portugal, Germany, France and Italy. This isn’t the case for Americans. I was greeted with a certain amount of surprise when I disclosed my country of origin with one person even exclaiming, “wow, you are really far away from home.”  Yes, yes, I was.

            Cape Verde has only been an independent country for the past 39 years.  I was told that the changes that have taken place during these years have been positive.  Residents were happy to discuss the beauty of their country and how much better it got every day.  The government is growing and developing, but as with all countries, there are still a few issues that should be addressed.  I am sure changes could be implemented on each island.  However, I’d like to focus on the one I spent the most time on: Boa Vista. 

            As a tourist advised not to drink local water, I was very pleased to see that bottled, clean drinking water was readily available on the RUI resort.  Better yet, the Coca-Cola Company was one of the beverage corporations providing the product.  I felt secure in drinking their product.  However, I was saddened to see that bottles were disposed of randomly about the island outside of the resort.  I was told by members of the hotel staff that there were no recycling programs on the island. This was truly evident. Litter was seen for miles along the streets, on the public beaches and in the ocean.  Couldn’t @CocaColaCo begin a dialog with President Jorge Carlos Feonseca @presidenciaCV and their government to establish a recycling program to benefit the people and environment of Cape Verde? It broke my heart to see so much trash discarded on the beach and in the water.  The beauty of Boa Vista was blemished with trash.

            Within the RUI resorts, there were several stray cats and dogs that were cared for by guests as well as the hotels.  The hotel employees advised us that they had vets treat the animals to prevent guests from being exposed to potential disease.  However, none of these animals were spay or neutered so the stray population rises.  Perhaps a program can be established with prominent veterinary schools to help create spay/neuter clinics throughout the country? With this in mind, I’m hoping this blog entry gets the attention of a few organizations and people who may be able to help implement change and develop the proper relationships to help bring these changes to fruition.  People such as @cesarmillan @rickygervais and organizations like the @ASPCA @HumaneSociety - is there any way this can be addressed? Are there international organizations that can intervene?

            I see a great deal of opportunity to improve the quality of life on the island of Boa Vista in Cape Verde by addressing these two issues.  If a strong recycling program is introduced and funds are given for each water bottle and glass bottle then littering will decrease.  If animal welfare groups help to establish a spay/neuter program then there will be fewer starving stray cats and dogs in the streets. 

            I know, I am one American woman who brings her views and ideals to a very different culture.  I understand that not everyone in the world sees things in the same light. Still, wouldn't it be wonderful if pollution didn't exist and animals were all healthy and loved? Perhaps I'm describing Utopia.

Off the Grid

     If you read this blog, you may have noticed that I've been inactive for a bit over a week.  I took my vacation and traveled out of the country going off the grid.  I was completely unplugged from the USA and any news of my country. It was both a nice change and completely alarming.  I have felt a bit lost upon my return home.

     As I get my bearings and gather my thoughts (I did a lot of writing while I was away) I plan on posting a more detailed entry.  Meanwhile, enjoy the beginning of fall which is fast approaching.   

A Women's Place

            I must confess that I am completely baffled by the anti-feminist movement. Why would any woman be against feminism?  I did a bit of research and came across an article in the Washington Post titled Is this what an anti-feminist movement looks like?  It includes the Tumblr account with the photos I’ve seen going around on social media holding up signs that have anti-feminist statements. 

I have noticed that the word feminist is being poorly received by some young women. I believe the negative connotations stem from a misinterpretation of the word as well as a misrepresentation of the word by certain conservative groups.  A feminist is not anti-man; a feminist supports the rights and equality of women in all things and in all places. 

As a leader in the feminist movement, Gloria Steinem has been talking about the value of women for decades.  She raised her voice and helped us gain perspective on who we are, what we deserve and what we are capable of.  In fact, earlier this year she had a conversation with Jennifer Aniston on the subject. If you aren’t aware of her work please visit www.gloriasteinem.com and learn more.

Young American girls today may not realize how many limitations were placed on women in the past.  Because of the work of feminist women we have the right to vote, to work and to have an education.  It’s not like that in every country. Do you believe that Malala Yousafzai, the young Pakistani teenager shot by the Taliban for going to school, would be anything other than a feminist?  Young girls like Malala Yousafzai and women like Gloria Steinem help pave the way for the rest of us so that a women’s place is anywhere she wants it to be. Learn more about all of this before taking up any sign. 

Uncomfortable Conversations

            I generally spend the early morning getting ready for work and watching the Today Show.  This morning, I was impressed and touched by the interview that Jennifer Aniston gave to Carson Daily.  She shed light on something that I have been experiencing for years – our society’s judgment of a woman’s value being based on marital status and procreation.  This was so poignant that Tamron Hall continued the discussion.  While our career paths are vastly different, all three of us – Jennifer Aniston, Tamron Hall and myself – are women in our 40s who are single and childless.  I can only imagine the amount of questioning and scrutiny that both of those women experience.  They are both public figures, well recognized and followed by fans.  I am blissfully one of the masses in our society, a face in the crowd, able to come and go to my local supermarket at any time.  Yet, it’s comforting to know that we share in the same uncomfortable conversations with strangers and acquaintances.

Personally, I find that the critical eye of society judging my single/childless status is worse in the suburbs than it is in the city. Perhaps, it’s because the majority of people I am surrounded by in the suburbs of Rhode Island have married and had families.  Large cities have more diverse populations that include women like myself.  The balance of both lowers the ratio of uncomfortable conversations with strangers asking about my personal life.  I actually discussed this previously in Tales of a Little City in my first essay titled “The Age of Singleness” posted June 26, 2014.  Therefore, I won’t repeat myself with a second in-depth essay on the same subject.

In conclusion, it was a pleasant surprise to see women in high profile positions express the same concerns I have.  As part of the interview, Jennifer Aniston mentioned discussing this subject directly with Gloria Steinem.  The two women participated in an open discussion this past February at the inaugural MAKERS Conference.  While she didn’t go into detail about the conversation on television this morning, I was able to find the interview online.  If you are interested in learning more visit www.makers.com.

Upside Down

            Is it just me or does it seem that the world has turned upside-down? There seems to be an increased amount of violence on a global scale.  I read about violent crowds, shootings, tear-gas, and bombings in the news more than of anything else.  I know that the old newspaper adage, “if it bleeds, it leads”, may have a great deal to do with my heightened awareness.  However, the violence itself is real.  And it’s both terrifying and saddening to me. 

            I haven’t written much of late due to all of this craziness.  I have opinions, of course, but would hate to have my viewpoints misinterpreted and lead to more negativity.  The situation in #Ferguson, Missouri has been beyond my comprehension. In this, I see a reflection of the past.  It reminds me of Mississippi and the Freedom Summer of 1964.  If you aren’t familiar with that bit of history, it is easily researched. I recommend visiting http://www.history.com/topics/black-history/freedom-summermankind and http://video.pbs.org/video/2365267174/ for more information on that momentous event.  Once you review these links, you too may find the parallel between the events of 50 years ago and last week. 

            They say one can’t judge another until they walk in their shoes.  Is that truly the case? It appears that no one is attempting to understand what is happening from any other perspective except his or her own.  And I can understand that to a certain extent.  We are all guilty of looking at life from our own point-of-view.  It can be difficult to identify with situations and people that are far removed from our own experiences. Shouldn't we at least try though?

            Still, I can’t understand the severe cruelty of this world. I can’t understand how one person or group of people can torture, maim or destroy another human being, young or old, or an innocent animal.  How extremist groups overseas can capture journalists, imprison them for years and murder them viscously while recording it to be broadcast over the Internet.  I refuse to watch that. Instead, I pray for #JamesFoley and for his family. 

             True, I’m just looking at this from my point-of-view, but I can’t see how anything that leads to murdering innocents is justified.  My heart breaks and my concern for humanity continues to grow.  Is our species truly doomed? Will we eventually destroy ourselves completely?